Me and the Beautiful Dawta took Chloe up to the vet and did what we had to do. I thought it kinda interesting that the vets office uses this pretty, flowerdy paper to print out the euthanization certificates. Usually, at the vets, Chloe would try to get up and get off the table, but, not today. Her back legs had pretty much given out on her. They asked if I wanted to be in there when they did it and I said I didn't think so and asked them if that made me a bad dog owner and they said "Absolutely not." Some want to stay and some don't.
The Dawta and I both noticed how Chloe's eyes seemed to be teary when we were telling her goodbye. Maybe it was just our imaginations. Our eyes were full and the hearts heavy.
I went outside and waited and I remembered the time I had brought Chloe to that same vet about 12 years ago to be boarded while we went on a trip. Chloe HATED leashes. Scared to death of them and wanted no part of one. She jumped out of my arms and took off running down the parking lot and I had to run like a madwoman to catch her before she got out into West Main/Gallatin Rd. traffic.
We brought her back to the house and our wonderful neighbor, Matthew, a big, sturdy guy, dug a good hole for us and me and the kids buried her. Each kid wanted to help cover the dirt. It was like they had to. That dog had been here longer than any of them and has been with them every single day of their lives.
Chloe went through a lot of life with us....births, a divorce, greeting each kid when they came home from their first day of school, a lot of nights I was alone with Mr. Smiff on the road, she was right there, being a good watch dog, always sleeping right under my head, if I got up, she got up, she got up, even if it was just to the bathroom. Gosh, Chloe even knew my dad, who has been dead nearly 15 years.
#2 asked me if Chloe was in Heaven. I told him I don't know for sure, but, I feel that God has a special place for special pets. He has to. I hope so. Chloe is deserving of whatever special place there is for dogs when they die. She was everything a good pet should be: loving, forgiving, protective and a faithful little friend. There were times she drove me nuts because she had a nervous/insecure side to her, but, I'm glad I saw that ad in the paper that day in 1991 and that I brought her home, even though I was not sure what Mr. Smiff would say. She was so tiny, she fit into my hand and I hid her behind my back before I broke the news to Mr. Smiff that it was a girl.
Everyday when we feed the dogs, there's this routine of Chloe being in charge of the food. The other dogs eat, pretty much when she said so. This morning, when she wouldn't eat, they ate theirs and I noticed after I got back and done with everything, they had not touched her food. Normally, it's a contest. Amazing how instinctive dogs are. Maybe they're hoping she'll be back later to eat. Who knows.
**Once again the wonderful Blogger is being contrary and won't let me put a picture up. Look at the Flickr.
Take a whiff of Sista Smiff and you'll come back for more, that's fo sho!
Saturday, June 24, 2006
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9 comments:
well, chalk one up for you, sista, you made this crusty, anti-mammalite cry like a baby. again, my sincerest apologies. big hug.
much love.
Oh I am so sorry.
So very sorry.
I am sending you much love for your difficult decision today.
I believe it was Andy Rooney who said, "The average dog is a nicer person than the average person." I've often found that to be true, although perhaps I just hang out with the wrong people.
I am so sorry you had to face the loss of a family member today. You are in my thoughts, and I offer my sincere condolences to you and your family.
We're so sorry for you and your family. Hopefully the good memories will help you get through this difficult time.
As for your little one's question about pets & heaven; I feel like that's one of the ways we'll know when we get there. As much love as pets give people, it wouldn't be heaven without them.
My daughter had posted something on her My Space about Chloe and one of her teachers wrote "Just think how many toys and treats she has now!" I thought that was sweet of her to say and it really comforted my girl.
I am so incredibly sorry. I had no idea about this until this evening, and I'm glad. Because I haven't stopped crying about it for a couple of hours now.
Do pets go to heaven? Well, I have two theories.
One, I think pets are given to us by God, as a sort of angel unaware. And just like angels, they'll be with us in heaven.
Two, pets have no sin nature--they have never "fallen" and therefore are not in need of redemption. No, they have no redeemed soul. But like the angels, they don't need one to be a part of our experience.
Revelation says "He has wiped away all tears from their eyes. There shall be no more death nor sorrow nor crying nor pain. The former things are all passed away. He that sat upon the throne said 'Behold! I make all things new!'"
I take that to mean that pets, being "things" and not "souls" will be made new and rejoin the new earth. Maybe that's a twisted bit of theology, but I know beyond all shadow of doubt that my dogs are gifts to me from God. As Chloe was for you.
I agree, Katherine. Thanks y'all for all the sweet words and thoughts. I knew this was coming and even though part of me is relieved for her, there's another part of me that's just all achy inside.
When I was 8 years old, "Pretty Girl" passed away. She was not the family's dog - she was MY dog. The loss was devistating for me. When I asked my Mama if dogs go to heaven, her response was "The Bible does not tell us anything about that, but, The Bible does tell us that little boys go to heaven. The Bible also tells us that everyone who is in heaven is very happy all the time. I know that dogs make little boys happy, so I think that dogs do go to heaven".
This answer satisfies me to this day.
I'm sorry for you loss. Only other dog people fully understand.
Terry.
I am so sad to hear this. We lost our oldest cat a year or so ago, I cried and cired, but it had to be done. I got a nice card from the vet's office--isn't that cool. We'd had that cat 17 years so he left a big hole.
My sympathy to you, I'm so sorry.
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